Truth will prevail

Dear family,                                               10/25/2010                                                                                                           
   I was very glad to get your letter. I know the news still isn't good but I at least wanted to hear something from my family. This whole week I have been in a strange state of being. In times of extreme grief of pain you feel as though everything is a dream and you are just waiting to wake up from this unreal existence. This was made even easier to believe none of this was real as the only thing I had to go on was a call from my mission president. I have never felt so disconnected from all of you in my life. It was the first time on my mission that i truly felt the enormity of distance between us. I tried to stay focused this week but I felt my mind wander back to the situation and what all of you could be doing at any given time. My heart still aches for all of you. I feel, however, that I have avoided the temptation to let it become an excuse for me to take time off for myself. This is a critical time in my mission and if I haven't learned how to deal with tough times up to this point then I don't really know what I have been doing out here. If I truly know that the work is true then nothing should stop me from moving forward. So forward we go.
   I spent the first 4 days of the week in Riga where we received extra training on teaching. When I finally got back to my area I again was relieved that I could speak in Lithuanian with people again and not Russian or Latvian. We got right to work and in the few days we had we found 6 new people to teach. This Sunday a less-active that we have been working with for the last 2 months finally came to church to take of the sacrament. It was a small victory for sure. Last night we got lost. We had gotten on an unknown bus which took us near the outskirts of town and then the bus driver said, "get off!" We were alone on the bus except for an old lady who quietly got off the bus. My companion and I tried to find our way back to the main road. We thought we knew where we were so a little to hasty we went of into the dark and 15 minutes later found ourselves having walked in a huge circle. I took a minute to asses our situation. I looked around and in the distance I saw a church. That gave me some bearings and I realized where we were. As we were walking to the stop we found the old lady who couldn't see well and who was also lost. She asked if we knew how to get to center. We were in a very bad area late at night so I told her that we would walk with her to the bus stop and get her to center. We made it to a stop and a bus soon showed up and we made it back to center. It seemed as though whether we wanted to be or not, we were going to be led to help that old lady. God puts things in motion to bring about his purposes. We might feel like we are lost at first but if we can take a minute and find our bearings then we can be prepared to help others that are also lost in the dark. God loves us and wants us to be happy. Simple words with a deep eternal meaning. I feel peace for our family as I recalled some words from my Patriarchal blessing that I was confused about until now. Paraphrased, it just simply states how all at home will be well when I return. I know that scars sometimes remain as a memory but the pain fades away and we are strengthened in the process. I love all of you so much. Don't forget who we are and what we have.



with love,
Elder Cooke 

Angela's accident 10/19/2010

President Dance called me last night and told me about Angela's accident. I was shocked and confused about what i could possibly do. He told me that I should write you all. I feel such an immense amount of grief as I am sure all of you do. My thoughts keep returning to Kyle. I cannot begin to comprehend how he must be feeling. I don't feel that any words from me could ease that pain but I just want Kyle to know that I love him. I believe in him and I respect him more than he understands. My prayers return again and again to the plea, that He would know how much we all care about him and loved Angela. Angela was an embodiment of care and kindness. She loved us and we loved her. She was my sister and I will miss her a great deal. I am sorry I cannot come to the funereal even though nobody expects me too. I would do absolutely anything to make this time just a little bit easier for any one of you. Especially Kyle. I know that Kyle is a rock and can tough about anything out but this must seem like just too much. I hope Angela's parents and family is doing alright. I don't know what aright means in this situation but I hope they are at least surviving. This must be so difficult for all of you right now. I wish none of you had to experience this. I hope that everyone in this family remembers the things they have said to others when others have grieved for somebody that they have lost. When we are in the situation it is sometimes harder to remember the blessing and designs of God. But this is the time to see the gospel in action. You have gone to church, served callings and testified of the truthfulness of the Plan of our Father. You have all been strengthened for this day. God saw this day a long way off. Now is when we see the fruits. This is what it is all about. To overcome the hardships of the world and to grow. I know it is a time for grief and I know you have all heard the routine of, "everything will be alright" a hundred times. I don't want to vainly repeat these words of support but it's true. Everything will be alright. It will be. I can't express this thought strongly enough. And if you already understand it then let that one truth ease the pain and bring you peace. Time is never an object to God.  He wants you to know that. If you know that then you know how soon we will all see Angela again. She is just fine. I know that she is ok. That brings me a great measure of peace. Now my one wish is that all of you would be alright. I know it will take time but just know that I love all of you so much. I don't want anybody worrying about me. This is not about me. I will be fine. I am in good hands out here. I can feel God with me and I know he is with you. He loves all of you. You are all so strong and when you are together you are even stronger. Cookes don't quit. Tell Gabe that Sorensens don't quit either. In others you will find peace. Dont distance yourself from those around you. Find solace in the love that you all have for one another. Again, i love you all. I love you Kyle as I am sure you are reading this. Don't lose faith. Don't let yourself be brought down by what I imagine is an immense load. Your one of my biggest heroes. I want to be like you. I wish I could be with you through this but you have everybody else to help you in my place. I know that you would want nothing more than for me to keep going strong out here until the end. Know that I will do that. Turn to Christ. You will learn so much from this and it will benefit you the rest of your life. I know you might not value that very much right now but God does. I know Christ is our savior and redeemer. He is with us when we think all is lost and he will stay with us until we learn that all is not lost if we stay with him. I know that Angela will be seen again. I know she is happy and wants us to be happy. I know that we are all bound together. She has been separated from us for only a short time. We will all be together again. I know it. I love all of you. Know that my prayers are with you. Don't lose faith.


Elder Cooke

Letter from the field October 18, 2010

Well, The last transfer call came and went. I am still in Kaunas, Lithuania. I am not, however serving with Elder Manning. I am serving with Elder Graham again! Elder Manning has gone to Klaipeda and I am training Elder Graham as the new Zone Leader. I will be the district leader in Kaunas for this last transfer. Elder Graham is doing great. It is really fun to see how much he has changed since I was with him in his second transfer about 10 months ago. He has just grown so much. I have had such a good opportunity to see so many missionaries change in so many good ways. I am glad I still have some more time to get some more changing in myself. I have seen a lot of great improvements in myself but I still have so much to change.

   Speaking of change, It seems like everything is going to be different when I get back. People are getting pregnant, getting married, joining the army, getting bowl cuts. It just seems like It going to be a shock- so many changes. The pictures are enough to blow my mind. 

   Conference was awesome!!!!! I can't believe how much I Iearned. I am so grateful that we have the opportunity to listen to such inspired men. LISTEN and then change. President Hinkley stated at the end of a conference session that if people go home and are closer to Christ then the conference was a great success. If not,however, then the speakers have in a large measure failed. (slightly paraphrased) True statement. The point of conference is for the perfecting of the saints and the building of Gods kingdom. Same with all other conferences. I will pray for Dad so that he will know what should be said so the people that listen will know that the are supposed to do something, not just listen. I can be the best speaker of Lithuanian in the world but if nothing changes because of it, then it what is it for? We must desire change. In ourselves and, with respect to free agency, in others. We can can have faith that if we are faithful then that change will happen.

   Here is a cool miracle. Elder Manning and I one day were flipping through the area book. He stopped on name of a man who was taught the year before. He had a strong feeling that we should call him. I called him and invited him to church. He came. We met with him a week later in his home and I committed him to baptism. He accepted and is set to be baptised on November 13. He lives in the other elders area so they will be teaching him now. I hope all that works out. Way nice man and family.

   Today we are having training for 3 days in Riga. We arrived late last night and will be leaving on Wednesday. It should be the last time I come here until the end. I am excited for the training. Lots of new ideas for teaching. I love teaching. Right now we are a little skim on good solid investigators. We are teaching people but they need to keep commitments. That man with the baptismal date is good but we aren't teaching him anymore. I want to find some more people. I know that there is still somebody I need to find. Pray for that if anything. Thank you so much for your prayers. 

   I hope Sadie does well at state. I am glad she was committed to go to the game and not to the wedding. I know that once I wanted to go to Kyle's state wrestling tourney his senior year but I had a B-ball game. I told Dad I didn't want to go the the B-ball game but he told me I had made a commitment and I needed to finish what I committed to do. We got handled in the basketball game and I was not very happy but I learned a good lesson. Finish things you start. Thank you all for all the lessons you have all taught me. I love you all.

 

 

Elder Cooke 

Getting To It!

Hey team,                                                                                               
   

   This week went well. Elder Manning and I got sick and so that was fun to work through. Be it for better or worse we don't take sick days. I just cant bring myself to stay inside for a full day and so far nothing has hit me hard enough to keep me from walking. I have had my companions make me come in early but we have still made it out every day to find and teach somebody. We watched conference in Lithuanian with the branch on Sunday. It is funny how as a missionary out here you have to be ready to do everything. I laughed to myself when it seemed so normal to have to set up all the equipment for conference. I always remember seeing all the media equipment in the church for conferences and things and just being amazed at whoever did all that. Our church just rocks. This is the first day of the transfer. we find out who we are with in the next day or two. I have a lot of interesting feelings. I think an experience I had last night wraps up how I feel right now. I had an image of myself last night sitting on our front porch on the steps. I remember how the air felt and smelt and how i felt before my mission when I was home in November 2008. Even though It felt nice to feel the feelings of home, in the image I saw myself start crying because I realized how far away Lithuania was. This entire world with all its people and way of life as a missionary was so far away. It wasn't a welcoming thought but I am glad i had it. I am glad because in entering my last transfer as a missionary I have thought a lot about how is the best way to end a mission such as this. It's never hard to go outside and work so that's not even an issue. But more of my attitude in the whole process. I have come to the conclusion that we must serve where we stand and see things how they really are. I can't just straight up ignore what is going to happen next month but I shouldn't dwell on it. Talking about definitely doesn't help anybody especially the person I am most likely talking to. But like Dad said before I left, "I know you are where the Lord wants you so why would I be sad? I wouldn't want you anywhere else." That is how I feel. I am where the Lord wants me so I am not sad. It was hard to say goodbye to you all but it wasn't more than I could handle and the same it is with leaving this place that I love. If I will be where the Lord wants me then I should be happy. All I can do right now is work while I have the call until there is nothing left to give. If I can do that then I will be truly happy. Don't worry about me finishing hard, it will all be left on the mat, I promise.
     I am glad you liked the things I sent. I wish I could buy you everything out here. I can't, nor will I ever be able, to express how deeply grateful I am for everything you all have done for me. Especially Mom and Dad who I know could be buying a thousand different things but yet insist on giving me the best life has to offer. Monetarily and in every other way possible. I am also very grateful for Grandma and Grandpa Cooke who live providently so they can help support all their grand kids. I don't feel worthy to any extent of such sacrifices. Elder Holland hit my feelings right on the head in his talk in Conference. Not only do I have monetary support but all the other type of support possible from siblings, cousins, friends and people I don't even know who get on their knees every night and pray for our relatively small but powerful force of missionaries. The support that I cannot even begin to scratch the surface of its depth and value is the constant support of my Father in heaven and my Savior Jesus Christ. I do not feel myself worthy to receive anything more from them. Even when I feel I am not worthy to ask a single thing through prayer. Every time I ask, I have received an answer to my prayer in one way or another. Even when I am driving myself down with bad habits and sin Christ, in his mercy and in the power of his endless atonement, deems me worthy to receive his guidance, council and support. He always does if we come to him in faith and humility. If we are trying as much as we are able in our own capacity to keep the letter and spirit of Gods commandments, then we will feel the cleansing and edifying power of the Holy Spirit and we will have the sustenance to keep going. Always remember that you always have enough to keep going. God promised it. I love you all so much. I miss you dearly but not enough to leave the work just yet. 


Laikykites, Elder Cooke

Dear Everybody,

How is life in Heaven, I mean Idaho

This side of the rock is just wonderful. We committed a man we are teaching to be baptized in November and he accepted. His name is Linas. He didn't make it to church. which is a bummer. I hope he can make it to conference this weekend. I am so excited to watch conference. We get to see it in English and then we always catch some sessions in Lithuanian so it's a fun expieriance. Riga was fun. Elder Gearhart and I went up and learned a bunch of new stuff to implement in our zone of Lithuania. One of them is committing people to be baptised in every lesson including the first. It is very direct and bold and I just love it.  My companion was excited to hear that BYU got thumped. I guess he would be since he will be USU's quarterback in couple years. I hear BYU is just way down this year. Well the work isn't- so that's the real good news. However last month the mission had huge setbacks as far as baptisms go. We had 3 as an entire mission last month. No good. But we are amped to go hit it hard this month. I am feeling really good this week. It is the last week of the transfer which is just crazy. I still have the fire- prbably thanks to the dilligent prayers of the family.
I am so stoked for Craig and Sylvia. Go get that taken care of. I love it when the Cooke family just gets stuff done.
You do your part and I'll do mine.
I love you all.
Keep the faith.


Elder Cooke