Su naujais metais!

With the new years!

2009 is gone. That just blows my brain. 2009 was my 1 FULL YEAR as a missionary. I cant believe it went as fast as it did. Guess that just means I have to put that much more into not wasting any time.
The New Year came and went without much ado. We even slept through the fireworks. THe mission had us inside for most of the days around new years because things tend to get a little out of control. The only realy interesting thing that happened was I heard somebody get slammed into our door. You know me, I was curious so i went and looked out the peephole and watch our female neighbor punch a guy in the face. There was some other people that showed up and they all wrestled around but nobody died so That was good.
Recently the only rattling thing that has happened is I was a little concerned about my health earlier. I started getting frequent headaches for that last few months. They would come about- in the afternoons and would just rock my world. I think it has a lot to do with the weather. We are inside knocking doors more often because of the bitter cold and i just need to be outside i think. But then i started getting frequent nosebleeds (sometimes 6 a day) but that usually happens to me in the winter. Valentinas and his family didnt like that answer however. They started praying thier gutz out. THey are just so darn faithful. I told them not to worry about it but they said they were going to take me to the hospital. I wouldn't let them so they told me TAU REIKIA NUSIZEMINTI! or YOU NEED TO HUMBLE YOURSELF! I just laughed. They thought it was my blood pressure so i said if they could get one of those little blood pressure checker things then i would let them do that. Well it turns out they HAD one and i let them check and it turned out i am about as healthy as they come. So honestly I dont know why i have been sick lately but it is something i can work through. I have been getting really tired lately but once i walk outside it usually wakes me right up. I like it when I am tired because it means i must be doing something right.
Ok now for some intense miricals. I am going to be sharing some very powerful things that have happened in this last week. I can honestly say that this last week could be one of the most spiritual weeks of my life. It started one night with a dream. I dreamed that I saw a woman who just embodied love and caring. She was giving a lecture and I was intently listening. SHe then stopped and came up to me. The sat next to me and pointed to a man i recognised as Marius, a recent convert here. She said that he needs help and that i should help him in "real life." The next morning I told my companion and we gave him a call. We had recently been to his house and it was just a mess. We set up a time when we could go over and help him clean up. In short we took his house from compleatly unlivable to decent. We did what we could. But the mirical is that in helping him we found some things in his apartment that showed some things we need to review in the missionary lessons. Also Marius has alot of trouble reaching out and asking for help. While redoing his floor i taught him that we need to accept help sometimes. Even our Prophet has councilers. We dont need to get through life alone. He came to church this last Sunday and he had an entirely different countinance. He looked like he had a little more light in him.
January 2, 2010 will be a day a never ever forget. The entire day i had many buffetings from the advisary. And while blessing my egg drop soup i prayed. I didnt "say a prayer" but I PRAYED. I didnt know what to say or what to ask for. I just said, "Teve, tu zinai mano sirdi, prasau padek man surasti pagalbos" or "Father, you know my heart. Help me find some help." I was then prompted to go read from the New Testiment. I read from Colossians ch3.

"9 Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the bold man with his deeds;
10 And have put on the new man, which is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him:
11 Where there is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcision nor uncircumcision, Barbarian, Scythian, bond nor free: but Christ is all, and in all.
12 Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
13 Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.
14 And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness."

Those words hit me in a way I cannot describe. I was filled with the spirit and i realized how much of my life has been wasted as the "old man" I knew I needed to make changes in my life. I knew i needed to become somebody else. We say often "You need to be yourself" well...how do we know who ourselves are? Our "selves" are eternal. Not just on this mortal plain. We dont know ourselves. We dont know who we were before this life. In all actuality we are fighting to "Become" ourselves again. I need to be different. I understand that on a different level now. In the ponderings of those verses, God saw fit to reveal some heavy truths to me of who I need to become in this life. I will say that there is alot of work in from of me. But i know that CHRIST IS ALL and in him we find ALL rightousness. ALL means 100%. I am currently reading the BOOK OF MORMON only marking the word "all". It makes you look at the word "all" differently. ...Serve with ALL your heart mind and strength. ...Leave behind ALL personal affairs. It is invigorating. I love it. I feel a new resolve to do this year right and then to keep going past that. But we need to start small. Watch the words you say. Watch your actions. I have had the pleasure of other dreams since that first one and i will save that for other days. Maybe i will tell you those ones in person. I feel closer to my Heavenly Father now than I have ever had. It saddens me that it took so long. But I know life is a process and I know that there is still so much I can learn. I am so excited to learn.
Thank you for "ALL" you do and have done in my life. I love you "ALL" with "ALL" of my heart.


Su meile
Vyresnysis Kukas

p.s. This is the new mission home address:
Cesu 31-2K2
LV-1012 Riga
Latvia

to write me letters use this pouch address/fold letter and tape & mail with a regular stamp:
Elder Jesse Bergman Cooke
Baltic Mission
P.O.Box 30150
Salt Lake City, UT. 84130-0150